I feel free. Free as a bird that flies through the sky, and it feels great. I answer to no one. Do what I want to do, when I want to do it, and with whom I choose. Many years ago, I made a promise to myself and it’s stuck with me since - never wake up on a Monday morning dreading having to go to work. 

My question to you is - are you free? 

I’m sure a lot of people out there will claim to be, as I did for many years. I lied, telling myself that a bank account full of money gave me freedom. But in truth, money can be a leash. A leash that stops you from becoming who you truly are as a person. 

But, I want you to ask yourself once again - are you truly free, or are you lying to yourself? 

The whole Coronavirus pandemic has made a lot of people question many things about their lives - relationships, jobs, friends. even political stances, priorities and future goals. 

Life is short my friends. Do not waste another day living your life to please other people - be that a religion whose principles you question, working a job you hate, or being stuck in a dead-end relationship void of love, sex and excitement, simply because you have kids and a mortgage.

Own your shit and be true to yourself. 

Do not become a people pleaser. It’s a weakness and state of mind that many people find themselves in. You won’t be respected by the people you’re trying to please, let alone the person you should be pleasing - you! 

You might start off meaning well, but you’ll soon find yourself applying the same principles to other areas of your life and within no time at all, you’ll become weak, unhappy and a shadow of your former self. 

I see it with married couples all the time, which might explain why divorce rates are so high. Just because you say “I do” doesn’t mean you should write off who you are, or were. 

Remember the vows - for better or worse...

Yes, some caveats apply in most cases. But I trust that those reading this are gifted with common sense. 

Own your shit, dude. Like a man, a real man! 

Anything less than 100% honesty is ultimately lying. And that’s never a good thing. I see so many Men, living their lives with a closet full of secrets. These guys generally end up being henpecked and under the thumb. So what if you did drugs, slept with prostitutes, or made mistakes in the past. Such things might not be who you are now, but don’t hide it like a dirty little secret. 

Little white lies often become significantly bigger as time goes on. Sooner or later it will come back and bite you on the arse. 

Own your shit! 

You owe it to yourself as much as a future wife or husband. What type of relationship is built on dishonesty? Certainly no long lasting ones that’s for sure. Little white lies tend to grow into bigger more sinister lies the longer they are left unearthed. 

And if your past is an issue for a potential friend or partner, then better it comes out at the beginning than 5/10/20 years down the line, right?

What about your career? 

Forget that it pays the bills, gives security to your family or pays for the annual holiday, where you over-eat, get sunburnt and drink your way to oblivion, for two weeks to forget about your life and career back home.

The job that you convince yourself you actually enjoy...

Are you truly free? 

One thing I’ve learnt in my rather colourful 41 years of existence is that secrets become a heavy burden to carry around. Trying to be someone you’re not becomes tiresome. And, in most cases, you become resentful and somewhat bitter and angry. 

Do you have sex enough or does your wife/husband/partner use it as a reward for when you’ve been a good boy?

Do you enjoy enough YOU time, out with friends, enjoying a hobby, or time to pursue a new career?

Do you respect yourself? 

Are you the Man you know you can be? Or, do you lie to yourself and convince yourself you are putting the needs of others before your own when all you’re doing is taking the easy option because you haven’t got the balls to own your shit?

Maybe you can relate to all of the above or just some aspects. That’s ultimately for you to decide. But, let me ask you this - 

Are you truly happy?